Reflecting on 2009,i realized that it's been an overwhelming year. It all started back in Jan when i started living my new identity: Valor.
Actually God sorta gave me the idea for that name around the end of 2008 coz He wanted to let me know that my life needed to move in a different direction now.
No more playing it safe or being too comfortable and doing easy things.
It was time 4me to start living fearlessly for God, and step up to the next level in this journey of faith.
And I gave it a shot.
And God took me on an incredible journey.
December 2008 - I had to work with my previous Creative Art pastor to produce our first broadway style christmas musical ever..."Journey to the Manger" with jst about 3mths of preparation. Hands down-the craziest months of my life- God taught me a lot by putting me in a position where i had to handle a lot more stuff than I bargained for. Never felt that much pressure in my life, nor so much responsibilities shoved to my face. But when I finally got to the end, I could look back and totally see how God's been there through it all.
Despite all the 'heartache' =p n longhours...I learned to do things I never thought I could, I was stretched beyond belief and GOD proved that I can do all things through Him who gives me strength. He is able.
I learned that if u take God out of the box, He will take u out of ur box too.
I am so limited, but God is limitless
And going through 2009 i've experienced kind of the same thing. Maybe I was kinda like Jim Carrey in 'YES MAN' =p well,maybe not that stupid hahah. But I did everything that I felt God told me to,telling myself, 'you're valor for goodness sake!'. Yea I had doubts,was hesitant smtimes,tried to bargain with God smtimes,
but I kinda see a pattern after a while (well, at least for me). When things seem too difficult or huge to handle at first glance,when I'd prefer to runaway from it, when I am more unsure about myself or my abilities, thats usually the sign that God wants it done =p.
And the hardest one ever...when it involves a choice between pleasing God or pleasing ur friends, ur boss, pleasing man. AAAGH.
So, obviously, my cases don't always end happily,the way i wished it to be. Lookin back I can't believe how gracious n merciful God's been to me.
How faithful, how unconditionally loving.
When I started my new job last August, teaching and counselling Secondary students,
I felt like I'm thrusted into another. My character,integrity,faith, evrytg was put to the test. The first 2-3 months were crazy tough. Thought I was training and teaching these kids, but God was training me too.
I learned that teens have 6th sense that help them know when u're not practicing urself what u're teaching them...and the 7th sense to know whether u're sincerely interested in them as aperson or just doing ur job.
I learned to be silence and wait for God's defense whenever I face oppositions or unfair judgement...
but I experienced how God make little things happen, small but meaningful and rewarding things, that can only make me say in amazement...
"IT WAS ALL WORTH IT"
the hardships, the trouble, the extra hours spend, extra energy, extra mile,
...just worth it. And then I wud finally get what God was trying to show me.=)
2009...year of so many 'first time' thing.
1st time I painted a mural with the YWAM Art Evangelism Team, awesome experience.
1st time I made a painting project for missions convention (which is perfect timing coz God taught me 1st through AES team that even for the smallest painting,mural or any art, if we pray and ask, we'll get God inspiration, which is better than our own ideas...that was a mind changing experience, priceless!)
1st time we did a worship painting for Easter play
1st time I prayed online with a friend, I almost didnt do it, but in the end he thought it was pretty cool, and i've been doing it more eversince =p
1st time I shared the Word of God to around 200 ppl,(students n teachers in school)
and as shocked as I was when my boss asked me...I found myself saying 'okay, i'll give it a shot'. And the fact that some of my students saw how nervous I was, became a useful testimony, prooving to them that I too am not normally brave and confident, but when we step out, God takes care of the rest.
1st time I did a graffiti on an actual wall yay! plus it was the 1st time I made good friends,all graffiti artists over a super short period of time and they were already teaching me all kinds of stuff n being super nice. And I get to share with them bout GospelGraffiti, how there are young highly talented artist who use
graffiti to put up positive and impactful messages, even to spread the gospel and Jesus name.
like I said...living for God...is totally WORTH IT.
Can't imagine living any other way.
I can only hope that when Jesus look at me,and remembered how he came to earth, suffered,humiliated and died on the cross...and conquered all that so I can be saved,...He wud smile n say...'it was worth it'
as for 2010
...the Lord has told you what is good,
and this is what he requires of you:
to do what is right, to love mercy,
and to walk humbly with your God.(Micah 6:8)
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